Commonly, we hear the exciting details of how marriage proposals unfold.
However, we rarely hear the man’s perspective and how he got permission
to "ask for your hand".
InsideWeddings spotlights how Patrick Deyhle got permission to marry
Vanessa Abreu, who is now his wife.
via Inside Weddings
"Patrick Deyhle confesses that the first time he laid eyes on Vanessa
Abreu, he knew he would one day ask her to be his wife. Before he could
do so, however, he would have to have a very important and intimidating
conversation with the other man in her life: her father. Here's how
Patrick tells it:
'Vanessa's family is very traditional Portuguese, and I was also raised
to believe that you don't propose without getting the father’s
permission first. This combination of factors necessitated my decision
to ask permission.
Vanessa's father is somewhat of a power player in the community, and
although we have a fantastic relationship, I was extremely nervous about
asking his permission. Also, I had a sense that everyone in the family
was starting to wonder when I would propose, so I had to be extra
I called her father and told him to meet me at his favorite restaurant
so we could have a chat. He probably knew what I was going to ask,
because at the time it was not common for us to meet for drinks. When I
arrived, he had a table all set up for us, with appetizers, wine, and
everything. I had driven myself into a nervous frenzy by then.
We had barely sat down before I told him that I loved his daughter and
wanted to ask his permission to marry her. Before I finished speaking,
he started nodding and said that he would love having me as an addition
to the family.
It was fairly emotional, and without a doubt I was more nervous for that
event than I was for the actual proposal!'"