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Wedding Dress Problems: How Sexy is Too Sexy?


Theoretically, your wedding day is your own fabulous red-carpet affair, so if you want to strut down the aisle in the latest, barely-there bridal gown, it’s your prerogative, right?  

Maybe.  But realistically speaking, the perception of “too sexy” is in the eye of the beholder. So, if you don’t want the minister to blush through the ceremony and stammer delivering readings, while your aunts and uncles roll their eyes upwards for a possible explanation as to your bridal attire, you need to keep the “sexy” quotient to a balanced ratio. 


Private Placements

Nothing wrong with flashing a bit of what your mamma gave you at your red-carpet moment, but mimicking verbatim bare-it-all lingerie style get ups of the likes of Kim Kardashian, Beyoncé or Jennifer Lopez for your bridal gown may not go down so well with all the “dearly beloved gathered together in the sign of God … to join together this man and this woman in holy matrimony.” 

So, guideline numero uno — keep the more private parts private – at least for the ceremony.  Is your heart set on a bodycon gown with a deep plunging neckline and cutouts all over the place?  Fine, go for it.  But for some coverage at the altar consider an add-on piece, such as a stole or a cardigan or a veil —these pieces are easily discarded for that definitely more “loose” atmosphere of the reception!


To bosom or not to bosom

How much cleavage on display is appropriate for a wedding gown?  Well, if an infant in attendance is reaching towards you to be fed, you’ve gone too far.  If a friend who moonlights as an exotic dancer asks you to lend her your wedding dress, you’ve gone too far.

There is strapless and off the shoulder, and there is the deep plunging V neckline that reveals everything right down to the navel, or farther.  You can probably get away with that deep plunge if the exposed parts are visibly sheered over.  Sans sheer, you’re asking for a backlash.  Sans sheer and a side boob view, and you’re at risk of having your guests leave the ceremony shaking their heads in disbelief. 


Skin (over)exposure

If you want to hit that sweet spot in the sexy look—somewhere in the middle between the sweetly feminine and downright slutty—try and aim for a certain balance of both.  If you're going to do a deep plunging neckline, keep everything else simple, chic and PG.  And don’t make it more about the undergarments than the dress itself! 

Backless or barely-there backs (hello, Kim K!), are a current rave in bridal.   But keep in mind that it is your back that will be front and center for your guests.  So, if your back is exposed all the way to your tailbone, maybe you should consider a veil for the ceremony!


Add-ons and convertibles to the rescue

Today’s designers and brides are definitely opting for seductive —at the very least, or nearly X-rated—at the most— silhouettes, but at the risk of sounding like your grandmother, trendy and sexy doesn’t always mean appropriate for a wedding.  

So, if there is an issue with you wearing a barely-there gown you just absolutely adore for the ceremony, buy another more “decent” one and change into the sexy one for the reception.  Or cover up the over-exposed areas with some add-ons.  Another option is a convertible gown.   Might be fun to have a big traditional tulle skirt you can remove after the ceremony to reveal a sequined mini dress and your gorgeous legs! 

There is certainly nothing wrong with showing a little skin at your wedding.  Gowns with a bit of transparency in the lace to reveal the undergarments, minimal halter necks, and midriff-baring two-piece designs are ok.  But if your thigh-high-slit and super low-cut bustier gown leaves virtually nothing to the imagination, maybe it’s better to leave that one for the wedding night!